“how to”

I don’t even remember what it was I was searching for in the first place, but after typing the first two words, “how” and “to,” the search engine elves started suggesting how I might want to complete the thought:


I wondered how many of these are specific to the computer I was using, or the geography of my IP address, or basic societal and cultural preferences that Google has certainly come to understand. Regardless, I was delighted to find that destroying angels and cooking rice were, in some way, nearly equivalent. I like the fact that kissing and drawing have equal difficulty, and that writing a resume and preparing corn on the cob have the same level of importance.

How do you destroy an angel? And why would you want to? I suppose the person who makes such a search is wondering the same about writing a resume. Or, maybe if you know how to destroy angels and make fabric flowers, the resume practically writes itself.

One thought on ““how to”

  1. Puzzling! Here is what I discovered when I engaged in the same search with comparison to your recommended answers. No, I did not make up what appears on my list.

    Both lists: “How to…”
    tie a tie.
    train your dragon.
    write a resume.

    Unique to my list: “How to…”
    make jello shots.
    write a cover letter.
    lose weight fast.
    grill corn.
    cook lobster.

    If you can’t destroy an angel (assuming you could even find one) then you have the fallback position of making flowers. Me: if losing weight fast at least I’ll know how to apply heat to scorch maize and/or torture giant marine arthropods. Wait: are lobsters actually agents. What have we done??!! I need a jello shot!

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